In this case, during her next visit, the woman and her children left when the father-in-law began to tell such a "joke." She did that two more times, at later family gatherings, before her father-in-law finally refrained.
Let's learn about his religion." Create opportunities for children to spend time with and learn about people who are different from themselves. Every year, Halloween becomes a magnet for stereotypes.I didn't know what to say." Speak up without 'talking back.' Repeat information, removing unnecessary racial or ethnic descriptions: "What did the checkout clerk do next, Mom?" Or, "Yes, I like these mixed nuts, too." Subtly model bias-free language. Call upon the principles that guided your childhood home.Power and history come into play in such moments, affecting how comfortable or unsettling it feels to speak up. And other questions take shape: Was bigotry a part of daily life in the home you grew up in? Do you forgive bigotry in some family members more than others?
Do the "rules" about what gets said — and what doesn't — change from one home to another? Working together, will you find greater success in speaking out?They told us what they did or didn't say — and what they wished they did or didn't say.