If you believe no woman could possibly find you attractive, you will elide over all evidence to the contrary – women flirting with you, giving you the “come-hither” stare or even just smiling at you – and focus like a laser on every incidence of negativity.
You will see every interaction in the worst possible light: “she doesn’t like me, she’s clearly repulsed by me, she’s only being polite, I’m misreading the signals” This apparently unending stream of reinforcement will only serves to perpetuate a vicious cycle; your self-limiting beliefs cause you to overlook evidence to the contrary, thus reinforcing the belief which, in turn, continues to make it impossible to see the truth. Believing in yourself – that you’re attractive, that you have a lot to offer others, that you can you.
The metaphorical scent of desperation is the antithesis of attraction; much like negativity, it suffuses about you, from the way you speak to the way you act. It screams of low self-esteem and equally low regard for the person on the receiving end of their attentions.
Not because it’s notice or pay heed to that which confirms your pre-existing belief.There’s nothing less appealing to a potential partner than feeling as though that they’re nothing more than a warm hole or body that’s filling a slot marked “girlfriend”.The more desperate you are to get what you want, whether it be sex or a relationship, the more likely it will slip through your fingers.On a practical level, desperation hurts you in a multitude of ways.
You’re less likely to meet someone you would consider you will be turned off when they realize that any warm body will do and still more will assume that there must be a reason why you’ve been refused so often.
I was sabotaging myself in a number of ways that I didn’t even realize…